For the majority of my life I've felt like my head has been up in the clouds. Not in an airhead kinda way (OK, sometimes lol), but in a way that opens possibility and enables me to imagine what I want my future life to look like. I'm sure I'm not alone when I say I often daydream and fantasize about things that don't necessarily make much sense in the moment but maybe could one day?
You see, I've had a hard time in the past distinguishing a dream vs. a goal. I would have all these wild thoughts and then be unsure of what was realistic enough to actually make happen. All throughout childhood and adolescence I religiously followed a road map that had been pre-determined for me by my family at birth. Like most of us, I was taught how to act, what to strive for, and what needed to be accomplished in order to reach.... idk success? But these dreams that I had didn't really reflect those notions all the time. Now that my road map came to an end with graduating and finding a big girl job, it has taken me a while to decide which new dreams make me feel excited and would be worth the investment of time to actually dive into and keep consistent with.
My girl, Rachel Hollis says " A goal is a dream with its work boots on." But let's face it, I've always dreamed of being the next Selena y los Dinos 💃... except I was going to be Mary y las Chingonas and that has yet to happen. lol Probably because that name sucks... that and the fact that my singing is mediocre at best, which is the reason why that particular dream really isn't something worth the investment at this point. (Though, I did recently say that I wanted to record an album just for shits and giggles to bring myself some joy and cross it off my bucket list.)
My lack of fame is proof that not all dreams are created equally. But that doesn't mean they should be limited! You see, if that dream had really been important to me from an early age, I would have dedicated myself to singing lessons and did everything possible to allow myself to enter that realm with full acknowledgement that I had worked hard enough to earn a seat at the table. Though I enrolled in singing lessons as a kid, like most other activities, I went to a couple lessons and quit. I'm not sure if I thought that singing on my karaoke machine at home in front of my puppy was going to have the same effect, but as you can see, it didn't. I never really saw things through as a kid and no one ever really ever forced me to. As long as my grades were at the top of the class and I was "being a good girl" I pretty much could do what I wanted. Quitting things that felt the least bit inconvenient or hard (as long as it wasn't school) came very normal for me.
Call it a side effect of only 'child syndrome' I guess. It was awesome, I knew so many friends that hated sports but their parents MADE them participate on teams and attend practices, I thought I was so lucky. However, I now realize that part of the reason I've had such a hard time deciphering my dreams from goals is that I was always allowed to let go of hard stuff unless it was an expectation from my road map. Expectations of me were a given that I would accomplish... I mean, if school was all I had to shine in, best believe I was going to shine! But in reality, very few of those expectations were dreams. It wasn't until recently that I allowed myself to dream big, bigger than I ever have and I learned something... I didn't know how to put my work boots on! Shit, I didn't even own work boots... just rainbow flip flops! 😂 I needed to figure out how to show up and do hard things because that is the only way to accomplish anything! Any dream you have is going to be inconvenient for a long time until you create something meaningful. The journey within that inconvenience is preparing you for all the wonderful things that come once you see something through... It's preparing you for the magic that your goal will relinquish once accomplished.
Over the last several years, I have figured out how to get myself a pair of work boots, how to put them on, and how to KEEP putting them on EVERYDAY. I have become more confident in deciding which dreams are worth the hard journey and how to prioritize my time to include small steps each day that will take me to where I want to go in the long run. Most importantly, I have figured out that my imagination, though at times takes me to crazy places, is the creator of dreams and therefore my goals. Your imagination is what will ultimately create your future self, it's worth listening to! When you're unhappy with something and imagine a more beautiful reality... that's when you write it down and map it out! What might that different reality look like? How you can make small strides towards that place of beauty? What are some shorter markers you can make that will add up to the whole vision?
I'm never going to be a Tejano superstar and I'm totally cool with that... especially since I'm not from Texas... 🤣
BUT, I am going to keep that dream and the image in my mind as a reminder that my imagination creates dreams that will absolutely happen if I put those damn boots on everyday and want it bad enough. I hope this little story encourages you to listen to your inner dialogue a little more intently and decide which dreams are worth becoming your goals and ultimately your plans.
"If you have a dream, don't let anyone take it away and always believe that the impossible is possible" -Selena Quintanilla
XOXO- M
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